We always hear from our elders that raising a kid is not a child’s play which I have mostly ignored until now. Trust me the moment motherhood has knocked my door this reality fell upon me in just no time. The days became nights and the nights became days…
Let me share one of the incidents which left me in a great web of confusion.
Two months ago, I got blessed with a baby girl. It was truly a magical moment for me and my family. Everything was going great till I guess two hours from her birth:)).
Nurse brought our daughter to us and explained all the do’s and don’ts in a speed of hurricane. We were given a Vitamin D3 drops which has to be given to my kiddo, 0.5 ml everyday (you will get to know why numbers are important soon). And a very important thing, formula milk without bothering whether I am able to lactate or not. Thank god, I had done my homework on breast feeding (all credits to my friend Vidya Sanap). I tried for nursing my child but couldn’t. Trust me it was a nightmare for me. All I wanted was to breast feed her.
Got discharged in 4 days and yayy we are home.
But still not able to nurse her. At this moment, all I was wanting was to breast feed my daughter at ANY cost. Then one of my aunt gave her best to help me nurse my baby. And ahhh!!!! It was just out of the world feeling… I did it. Yes, I did it. I was lactating and my husband almost cried:)). That moment was utterly satisfying, can’t be put into the words.
Now we were relaxed…uhh…wait..only for a few days. Why does she cry this much???? Ohh my god she just screams a lot…Why??? How much crying is normal?? Is her stomach hurting or is she hungry??? Couldn’t sleep??? What??? Or Is she just enjoying to scream??? What is it?
It’s time to see a “good” doctor. So, we took an appointment for Dr. Unaffordable. It seemed my serious issue was quite trivial to him. He gave hardly 10 minutes for loads of my problems.
And following was his diagnosis to my queries:
1. She cries a lot mostly in the evening times: I think he didn’t bother to give it an ear
2. Well she takes out her tongue very frequently as if trying to lick something: “hmmm…seems fungal infection, no worries we have a drop for that”
3. And her eyes are watery and have yellow discharge: Eye infection, again we have a drop for that too:)
4. But she seriously cries a lot!!!: 100% problem in her stomach, these 2 medicines, 7 drops, 4 times a day for 5 days (remember numbers matter here too)
5. Rashes on her face: “skin allergy”, use olive oil, “extra virgin olive oil, we have it :)”
6. She also vomits: Well that’s okay
7. I think she has cold: No nothing, all clear.
8. And her 6 weeks vaccination: we will do that next time
…that’s it, just a little bit of medication and we are done.. yayy!!
So, we fastened our seat belts and got ready to hit it.
Here was our daily schedule in a nutshell:
0.5 ml D3 daily, eye drops thrice in a day, tongue medicine to apply twice daily, two droppers 4 times 7 drops each for 5 days, and yes oil massage daily (remember extra virgin). Well to be honest these 7 drops 4 times was too much actually (owing to my gut feeling) as soon as I give it to her no matter how hard she screams it just makes her fall asleep. So I tweaked a little bit here. I used to give her only 4-5 drops and that too if she goes out of control. Sounds overwhelming?? Wait a bit…..
Let me go back to a small detail, currently, she was pooping almost 5 times daily (keep this in mind).
After five days, things hardly changed except the eye infection and we were back to the doctor. Now he wrote CBC and urine investigations. I was like seriously??? Maybe I should consult with some other doctor. And yes, now she pooped only thrice in a day.
This time we met Dr. Allrounder. She knows allopathy, naturopathy and Ayurvedapp. Hmm..sounds very interesting and reliable. We told her everything and she listened very patiently. She gave all grandma time’s suggestions as her prescription. Till this point my main concern was “Why does she scream a lot in the evenings?” And to her it was not a big concern. She said no medicine is needed, just:
1. Vitamin D3, 1 ml twice a day: from allopathy
2. Wet cloth and massage on stomach and one-one drop of coconut oil in each nostrils: from naturopathy
3. Traditional ghutti: from Ayurveda
And remember extra virgin olive oil, our Dr. Allrounder aid no olive oil, its not native. We will go for coconut and sesame oil.
Also it should be noted her weight was 3.9 kg at that time and at birth it was 2.7 kg. Almost gain of 1.2 kg in 45 days which means approximately 27gms per day gain.
Which is low according to Dr. Allrounder. She says 200gms per week. Yes, she believes in weeks rather than days.
So, we started our new regime. All medicines in the dustbin and desi tactics on the table. Now my little girl pooped once in a day.
Still…she cries in the evenings..huhhh..
My father in law suggested to visit one more doctor for cross verification and our final satisfaction. We then visited Dr. SuperSenior. He doesn’t practice anymore, gives favor only to close ones and we were lucky to have that.
Here it is:
1. She takes out her tongue every now and then: I would like to quote: “अब बच्ची जीभ भी न निकाले क्या”
2. She screams a lot in the evenings: Because she is overweight..because you do overfeeding..because you feed her in every 1.5 hours, and I said NO. Infact, sometimes I feed her in 3.5 hours too. He said “झूठ बोल रही हो”
3. But her weight gain is less than 30gms per day: Whattt…it should be 15 gms per day for 6 months, maximum 20gms. She is overweight.
“तुमने ही तबियत खराब की है बच्ची कि”
And at that point of time I seriously had no words…
Whom should I rely on and consult ahead? One says 30 gms per day and other says 15 gms. It has just been 2 months since I had my daughter and I am already got entangled in this doctor-doctor business. And, trust me I am not the only one who is caught in this web but one of my friends had also shared the same thing. This really made me ponder upon a few things..
Which medical system are we actually following?
Are there any standards and if yes should it be one fit for all?
Why things are not clearly explained at the time of delivery?
Now whose advice should I follow? Who is more genuine?
And the list is unending…the details I gave might seem overwhelming but trust me these were just 60%, actually going through all this stuff was so much annoying and completely try to get away our attention from the lovely activities of our child.
Though I am a budding mom but all I could say now is sometimes we should give more weightage to our gut feelings and do not directly follow the advices.
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4 thoughts on “The Flurries of a Newborn”
Very true and accurate., Also at the same time sad that we donot know what exactly to follow. And in this whole business the innocent child suffers which is heart wrenching for her mother. This should change. More awareness is required for new moms and newborns.
I know dear and I hope we would turn out as aware mothers.
I am quite new into medicine…but yeah we have been taught all these basic things abt d little ones…
1.putting out tongue repeatedly is considered normal this is one of the reflexs of new borns which indicates they are hungry and sometimes they do so to explore things…this will reduce as the time passes…
2.discharge from eye…definitely eye infection…new babies are prone for superficial infections as their immunity is low…which is resolved…
3.she cries a lot…in evening…crying indicates many things and only parent can observe whats bothering her…no doctor can tell it…it can be hunger…weather dimming of light…or may be you swich on lights in evening…closed environment…abdominal irritation…and there is a long list…
4. Regarding weight gain and loss…birth weight was 2.7kgs…so in 1st week there will be 10% weight loss in a normal newborn so by d end of 1st week she woud be of 2.430kgs…and now 3.9 kgs…in 1st 3 months 20-30 gms per day is d weight gain…according to Indian standards…so this is absolutely fine…you are doing great job regarding her feeds…
5.Skin rashes again due to low immunity keep d skin dry and use d oil which suits her…coconut oil is neutral…so good…
Danger signs are…fever…choking…bluing of fingers…any bleeding…swelling…and uncontrollable cry for more than 50 min…
6.puking and milk spills are very normal…try she gets burp after feeds…
Rest all is fine for others…and I am sure amazing for you new mommy and daddy…
Thanks, Keertika for your detailed response.
I am glad that you gave comments to all of my concerns very specifically.
Lately I have created a WhatsApp group for new moms and found that I am not the only one who is going through these issues. I would definitely share your response there.
And yes, if you’d like you may join our group, it would be great to get your advice 🙂